Cheating Because I Deserved To: Recovering From Marital Affairs

Indulgent Infidelity: I Deserved to Cheat

It’s been stated that people lead lives of quiet desperation, and this sentiment can also apply to relationships, especially long-term relationships and marriages with heavy obligations and commitments. So after years of dealing with raising kids, PTA meetings, working overtime to pay for the extra expenses your family needs and supporting your spouse in their own pursuit of happiness, you feel entitled to some satisfaction of your own. Thus, you’re more than okay with enjoying some tail on the side.

It’s not that your husband or wife isn’t satisfying to you or that your marriage is even rocky; you’re probably just feeling overworked and underappreciated, and need some release, something naughty and discreet to keep a small smile on your face while you’re busting your tail to make everyone but yourself happy. A simple need for release is one of many causes of infidelity.

If you think about this “naughty indulgence,” do you feel guilty afterwards? If so, do you still feel as if you deserved the affair for some reason? Do you enjoy the pleasure you derive from your secret encounters, yet feel you would be alright if it ended suddenly? Should you say yes to these questions, then this affair was more than likely an innocent affair. (Not innocent in the sense it was pure and just and morally acceptable, simply in that there existed no intentional desire to inflict harm on your spouse or anyone else for the sake of your pleasure.)

According to relationship and marital infidelity expert Mira Kirshenbaum, overwhelming feelings of guilt mislead cheating men and women to give more credence to their affairs than is necessary. Handling an indulgence affair is a simple feat: write it off as just that- an illicit indulgence that has no real meaning attributed to it. It was something you needed at the moment, for whatever reason, and move past it. If you feel pressed to investigate your infidelity, take a moment to reflect on why you were unfulfilled in your primary relationship, and take the time to restore that missing element to your marriage.

Chemistry for 30 Years, I Waited and He Still Didn’t Commit

30 Years of Emotional Infidelity – And He Broke My Heart

  

I am in healing state.  Things will get better.  However, I would so appreciate some light on how and why a man would do this.  Here is my story….I knew this man for 28 years.  I watched him make a poor choice in marriage.  There was always some chemistry between us.  He is my first born daughter’s god father.  There were times during our marriages when we met and enjoyed being with each other.  We did not have sex. Read more

Next Page »