Competitive Cheating: Affairs that Boost Sexual Relationships

Husband’s Cheating Reignited Sexual Passion in Marriage

 

Daniel and Jennifer have been together for six years, two married and four dating. Even though they really love each other, Daniel feels their sex life has died. Sex has gone from occurring three or four times a week to less than a few times a month. Additionally, the energy and passion isn’t there as much either. Despite the repeated attempts to spice up their marriage, nothing works, and Daniel starts an affair with a woman he meets on Craigslist.

 The sex is alright, but it’s still not as exciting as Daniel would like. However, he still continues to see this other woman while he attempts to reconcile his passion with Jennifer.

 It’s not long before Jennifer notices a change in Daniel’s behavior, and discovers his affair. While she’s hurt, and quite frankly pissed off, Jennifer cannot help but to feel extremely attracted to Daniel. She hates him for cheating on her, but at the same time she can’t keep her hands off him. Daniel’s infidelity has sparked an intense sexual, romantic reawakening between the couple that has been missing for a long time.

Why Does a Competitive Sexual Affair Happen?

 

As crazy as this situation sounds, many men cheat on their wives because of the desire to reconnect with their spouses. Relationships are continuous work for many people because they tend to “fall into a rut” with one another and let the sexual chemistry fizzle.

 While this isn’t a guaranteed response for every discovered infidelity, it works often enough that most people have experienced it in some form. Perhaps your husband ignores you until he sees another man giving you what he feels is “special” attention; later on, he tries to put the moves on you. Perhaps you notice that whenever another man looks your way, your husband becomes a little more territorial than usual.

 There are dozens of reasons why cheating or the threat of cheating can arouse sexual chemistry. Many people cite reasons such as the kinkiness of the situation; fear of losing their lover; or the need for anything to spice things up. One frequent reason discussed is competition; nobody wants to lose against someone else. One cheating husband once stated, “Competition breeds great service.”

Dealing with Competitive Sexual Infidelity

 

Although the flames of passion have been reignited, it’s not enough to get through this infidelity. Once the flames die down, you will still need to work through the poor communication which eventually led to sexual infidelity. You must handle the relationship with kid gloves now, and work to communicate with your spouse on the consequences of the adultery and save the marriage.

I Wanted to End it, So I Cheated on Her

Cheating to Purposely Make Someone Break Up With You

You’re not happy with your wife. You know you’re sick and tired of her, and you would really rather not be married to her much longer. The thought of spending the rest of your lives together, while hopeful at first, now throws you into a deep depression.

You feel stifled, hopeless and broken. You want to end things with her, but you know it won’t be easy. She’s going to push counseling. She’ll want to uphold religious views on marriage. She’ll cite something along the lines of, “marriage is forever,” and your families will back this sentiment.

So, instead of manning up and staying true to your desires, you devise a plan to coax her into doing the dirty work for you: you cheat on her. Cheating on your wife not only sends the message that you’re no longer interested in being faithful to her; it gives you hope that she’ll take the required steps to end the marriage and file for divorce.

Yea, you’ll look like a lying, cheating jerk to everyone who knows the both of you, but it’s the risk you’re willing to take to avoid being the one to “stir up trouble” – even though that’s exactly what you’ve done by having an affair to begin with.

If you’re the cowardly cheater, realize that your inability to end things does not make the situation any better for the person you’re cheating on. If your marriage has been damaged beyond any repair you desire to handle, then it’s time to accept your choice to let it go.

If you were cheated on, and this is how the marriage ended, accept the fact that this might have been out of your control from the moment your ex-husband felt this way. As painful as it may sound, cowardly affairs are designed to force your hand. Some people so desperately fear breaking up with the other person that they cannot just cut to the point and end things, even if that’s what they truly want. Sometimes they’re scared to take responsibility for the pain their choice would cause, and instead turn to cheating as an alternative method of communicating displeasure.

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