A Brave Man Shares His Story About Cheating Girlfriend & Infidelity
I’ve experienced heartache many times in the past but this one is the absolute worst. In the fall of 2008 I was engaged to my then-girlfriend, Casey*. We had been very good friends since we met in mid-2004 and kept in touch throughout the years. This time around, my feelings intensified and we started dating. Although it was long distance, we did what we could to make it work, managing to see each other every few weeks.
For a while, things were alright. We had our ups and downs like most couples, but we worked things out. In October of 2008, the topic of marriage came up and we made things official. We made plans move in together and she made the choice to move from Florida to Atlanta while I completed my training.
After lots of saving and careful planning, I purchased a ticket for her and secured a one bedroom apartment. Once she arrived, I figured things would only get better, but Casey changed almost as soon as she settled into our place.
Almost immediately, Casey got in contact with a friend of hers named Thad* that she knew from Florida but was now living in Atlanta. I didn’t think anything of it; I figured it would be good for her to have friends out here besides me and her godparents. I welcomed the idea of Thad with open arms- until we met.
I met Thad right after New Year’s and something about him rubbed me the wrong way. He had come over to our apartment complex one weekend. Casey decided to cook. When she left to get some groceries, he turned to me in the middle of conversation and asked, “You know Casey and I are just friends, right?”
Right then and there my whole attitude about him changed. Call me paranoid but I have female friends who have boyfriends and never did I have to inform them that we were just friends – and let’s also mention here that all she ever did was brag about him, which started to cause problems in our relationship. No matter what the hell I said, she would bring him up in conversation and it irritated me to the point where I told her to “shut the fuck up” about him. This became a point of contention between us in the following weeks, and she would accuse me of being jealous, yet go through my phone and pick fights about female friends that I worked with, knew or worked in the training facility I attended.
Although we decided to both work while pursuing our dreams, Casey became very lazy and dependent when she moved up here, and refused to give full effort in looking for work. Financially, and personally, it took a toll on me, and we began sleeping in different rooms. Our communication dwindled to where it seemed the only time she would talk to me is if she needed something from me.
Dissatisfied with the state of our relationship, I sat her down and we spoke about where we felt this relationship was going. I announced my unhappiness, and confessed to thinking about ending it. To make things worse, I had been temporarily laid off, and while I still able to make ends meet, she had just started working a new job and tried to discourage me about following my dream to be a wrestler as well as waiting to be reassigned at work.
Things continued to be rocky, and just when it appeared we were getting better, it all turned to shit.
I remember like it was yesterday. I had just been reassigned at my day job, and I was happy to be working again after weeks of doing nothing. I rushed home, eager to tell Casey the good news. She was busy talking to a neighbor, so I went to take a shower. I didn’t notice her phone was in the bathroom until it rang, with a picture of Thad and some Keyshia Cole ringtone.
“What the fuck?” I thought, rejecting the call. I’m serious when I say that Casey never gave me a reason to go through her phone, even after all the “Praise Thad” talk and her suspicious behavior. Call me old-fashioned, but I believe in the honor system. I trusted her but hearing that ringtone and seeing the picture threw all that out of the window. I searched her phone and found numerous text messages between them, with more than “friendly” messages. Crap like “I love u so much” and “I can’t wait to be with you tomorrow” among other things. As of that second, she and I were done. (Yes, people, text messages will get you in trouble.) After scrolling messages in her phone I came across an email that Thad had sent to her two days before with some attachments. The pictures I saw disgusted me to the core.
Thad’s email contained pictures of them naked in his bed with his penis out rubbing against her among other disturbing scenes. I angrily stormed past Casey, who was now sitting on the couch watching TV, and out the apartment. “After all the time and money invested into doing everything for her,” I thought, “this is the appreciation I get? Her cheating on me with this jackass?”
I called a good friend of mine to come over and keep me company because I was honestly afraid that I was going to do something regrettable. When he arrived, we walked back into the apartment where I confronted Casey about everything I saw in her phone. I told her it was over and that I wanted her out of my apartment, giving her a few days before I changed the locks.
Last I heard, she went to stay with her “friend” but less than a month later, he kicked her out realizing that if she cheated on me with him, nothing was stopping her from cheating on him with the next guy.
I’m in a better place now. I got my life back together after falling behind for a few months. It was a struggle but the second half of 2009 has treated me well. I’m doing shows, loving the bachelor life and I’m thankful I found out about her before we went any further.
My attitude about relationships and marriage has changed drastically but I don’t make any new woman in my life suffer for what Casey did to me. I still believe there is someone out there for me but for right now, I’m focused on me and what’s to come in my future.
*Names have been changed.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Yep good for you.
You don't deserve a girl like that man. It's good that you found out early enough..