What to Do When He Breaks Up With You
You thought you guys were happy until you discovered his sexual affair. You were completely sure that he was the one, that the two of you would be together for the rest of your lives. You even thought he was going to propose any day now. All of a sudden, everything changes and your world flips upside down.
He walks into the house with pink lipstick on his collar, and he smells like her perfume. You know something is up, and when you confront him, he doesn’t even bother to deny it. Instead, he takes a deep breath, walks over to you and says you need to talk. He casually admits to having a sexual affair and tells you he doesn’t want to work on your relationship anymore and it’s over between the two of you. What do you do?
It can seem as if your entire world has shattered at a moment like this. Not only has your love been cheating, but now he says there isn’t even hope of working things out. Take a deep breath, girlfriend. Everything is going to be oaky.
First of all, do not beg him to stay. Even if you do want to work things out, the heat of the moment is never the best time for solving major issues. Let him go. If he doesn’t call you at all, chuck up the deuces and allow yourself to process the end of your relationship. Think about the warning signs, the red flags you ignored or played down in your relationship, the clues which told you that something wasn’t right. Ask yourself if the both of you weren’t happy and whether this was addressed. Most of all, start getting real with yourself about the things you put off doing for yourself on account of trying to keep things afloat.
Be gentle with yourself as you take the time to really think through your relationship. You may not want to throw away a good thing over a terrible set of events, but a the same time you have to analyze what’s been happening, and you have to accept the fact that, for now, he’s gone. Yes, you want to know why he cheated on you, what it would have taken to prevent it – shoot, you want to know if it were even possible to prevent it.
There’s also a very strong, strong possibility that you still love and want to be with him despite the fact you were dumped by him after his sexual infidelity is exposed. You have pressing urges to call him, to hear his voice, to know how he’s doing. You want to say hello, you want him to pine for you. Truthfully speaking, you have every right to fight for your ex, but do you deserve to be the one chasing him back to love? Or do you deserve to lavish that extra attention on yourself and allow life to bring you the love you deserve?
