Cheating Boyfriends: Can I Blame Myself?

boyfriends cheated on women why men cheat Why do men cheat? Why do so many women have cheating boyfriends and husbands?”

These are common questions women who have been cheated on need answers to. The answers to these questions seem so important for a simple reason: women tend to blame themselves for bad relationships; it’s a natural aspect of their nurturing characters. It’s not hard for a woman to think she’s done something wrong when things don’t go right, and a loved one is angry, upset or hurt. If her boyfriend cheats, it’s because she’s not pretty enough, not attractive anymore, because she doesn’t give him blowjobs…

… but let’s stop here because this is flawed thinking.

First, it’s a selfish type of thinking. To think you have so much influence and control over someone’s actions that anything they do is a direct result of what you have failed to do is simply ridiculous.

Cheating boyfriends make the choice to cheat – period. Yes, the possibility that he wasn’t thinking could definitely be the case. If you both know for a fact that one too many shots leads him to act out of control, and it results in a one night stand, it’s still his choice. Why? Because he still made a choice to drink, knowing that he can’t control his actions beyond a certain level of intoxication. So even if he says he drank to get his mind off your troubled relationship, he still cheated as a result of his actions.

(And, yes, even sober, enough men – and women- don’t think when they do certain things. Sometimes, people need to see the consequences of their actions to understand that “spontaneous” living comes with a cost.)

Second, it’s his actions and, ultimately, his choice. If he decided that he wanted to get a piece of hot Candy Cottontail, then he made that decision. You weren’t in his head to know his thoughts at that exact moment, so don’t assume you have any direct impact on what cheating boyfriends do at the expense of your sanity. It’s just not worth it. If anything, you can explore why you choose to date men who cheat – and that can make for great self-discovery – but do not allow yourself to feel any type of responsibility for how someone who has free will has liberally chosen to behave based upon their own thoughts and motivations.

What’s Next?

I’d Like to Learn How to Attract a Good Man!

Where Do I Keep Finding these Cheating Boyfriends?

I’m Really Sick of Dating. I Want to Go from Girlfriend to Wife!

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Face Off!: Confront Cheating Husband’s Mistress with Unfair Advantage

Cheating husband mistress confronts wife sexual marital infidelity

Marital infidelity of a cheating husband can only be made worse by a confrontation with the mistress.

 

It’s every wife’s worst nightmare: to find out that your husband is cheating on you, and then actually meeting the asshole’s mistress when she one day suddenly stands on your doorstep with a self-satisfied smirk on her face, ready to spill the beans on your philandering hubby. Assuming that your husband is not a complete scoundrel before this episode, you’re likely to be shocked, hurt and betrayed. 

That’s a really harsh and traumatizing experience to deal with right there, but you can definitely keep your cool. Here are some things to keep in mind during this encounter, and when you actually get to speak to your husband about the whole affair. These tips will give you an unfair advantage: coolness beyond measure that will only put these two even further over the edge. [click to continue…]

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Cheaper to Keep Her, But Elin’s Just Another Tax Writeoff | Elin Woods

July 2, 2010
elin woods tiger cheated on nordegren wife

Elin Woods, soon to be ex wife of Tiger Woods, is almost set to receive about $750 million in her divorce settlement following his crazy multiple sexual affairs during their marriage. However, there’s more to the numbers than you think.

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Boyfriend Cheated? Moving Up and Above the Pain

June 30, 2010
boyfriend cheated emotional happiness advice troubled relationship

First, you have come to terms that the relationship is truly and completely over. This is never an easy process, but it’s not an impossible one either. When you have the time and the strength, ask yourself honestly and calmly why the relationship ended. Stop yourself if you notice that you’re leaning towards self-pity and self-destruction once again. It won’t help you at all! Go over the events leading to your break up in your head, and see where things started to go wrong. Usually, if you’re thinking clearly and logically enough, you’ll actually see the point where your relationship starting moving downhill.

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